{"id":1278,"date":"2018-11-01T18:49:21","date_gmt":"2018-11-01T18:49:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/?p=1278"},"modified":"2018-11-01T18:49:21","modified_gmt":"2018-11-01T18:49:21","slug":"warning-with-halloween-drawing-to-a-close-the-defenses-holding-back-mariah-carey-are-at-their-weakest","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2018\/11\/01\/warning-with-halloween-drawing-to-a-close-the-defenses-holding-back-mariah-carey-are-at-their-weakest\/","title":{"rendered":"WARNING: With Halloween Drawing to a Close, the Defenses Holding Back Mariah Carey Are at Their Weakest"},"content":{"rendered":"<p style=\"text-align: center;\">By:\u00a0Picov Andropo<a href=\"https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/mariah_carey_barrier_update.png\"><img data-attachment-id=\"1279\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2018\/11\/01\/warning-with-halloween-drawing-to-a-close-the-defenses-holding-back-mariah-carey-are-at-their-weakest\/mariah_carey_barrier_update\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/mariah_carey_barrier_update.png?fit=636%2C421&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"636,421\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;0&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"mariah_carey_barrier_update\" data-image-description=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/mariah_carey_barrier_update.png?fit=300%2C199&amp;ssl=1\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/mariah_carey_barrier_update.png?fit=636%2C421&amp;ssl=1\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-1279 alignright\" src=\"https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/mariah_carey_barrier_update.png?resize=300%2C199\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"199\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/mariah_carey_barrier_update.png?resize=300%2C199&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/mariah_carey_barrier_update.png?resize=480%2C320&amp;ssl=1 480w, https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/mariah_carey_barrier_update.png?w=636&amp;ssl=1 636w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/><\/a>v and Jake Spear<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">THE ICE REALM, Asgard \u2013 As winter \u2018proaches nigh, and the elder gods stir, Mariah Carey thunderously warms up her vocal chords, hastily chipping away at fall&#8217;s defenses against her resounding pop chorale. Each season, as the ground freezes over, the public must prepare themselves for the annual rite of Carey&#8217;s voice announcing the triumphant return of white girls in fur jackets.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">With Halloween passed, it&#8217;s only a matter of days before she&#8217;ll be heard again, entertaining wine nights and parties across campus. Holding no regard for the sanctity of holidays like Thanksgiving, in mere weeks she&#8217;ll be heard in every mall, radio station, and Target ad.<br \/>\nBut listeners beware: Mariah Carey will use her siren song to pierce your ears and grasp your soul. As she melodically asserts her dominion over humankind, she&#8217;ll screech, beautifully, once again grasping us all in her eldritch grip: &#8220;All I want for Christmas is you.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>By:\u00a0Picov Andropov and Jake Spear THE ICE REALM, Asgard \u2013 As winter \u2018proaches nigh, and the elder gods stir, Mariah Carey thunderously warms up her vocal chords, hastily chipping away [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1279,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"spay_email":"","jetpack_publicize_message":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[433,435,434],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i1.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/mariah_carey_barrier_update.png?fit=636%2C421&ssl=1","jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7b5Hd-kC","jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1278"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1278"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1278\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1280,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1278\/revisions\/1280"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1279"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1278"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1278"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1278"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}