{"id":1437,"date":"2019-02-11T20:30:28","date_gmt":"2019-02-11T20:30:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/?p=1437"},"modified":"2019-02-11T20:30:34","modified_gmt":"2019-02-11T20:30:34","slug":"iu-announces-ballantine-fence-expanding-to-come-between-you-and-your-crush","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2019\/02\/11\/iu-announces-ballantine-fence-expanding-to-come-between-you-and-your-crush\/","title":{"rendered":"IU Announces Ballantine Fence Expanding To Come Between You and Your Crush"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"2048\" height=\"1315\" data-attachment-id=\"1438\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2019\/02\/11\/iu-announces-ballantine-fence-expanding-to-come-between-you-and-your-crush\/ballantine-fence\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/ballantine-fence.jpg?fit=2048%2C1315&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"2048,1315\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;0&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/ballantine-fence.jpg?fit=1024%2C658&amp;ssl=1\" src=\"https:\/\/i2.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/ballantine-fence.jpg?fit=1024%2C658&amp;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-1438\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/ballantine-fence.jpg?w=2048&amp;ssl=1 2048w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/ballantine-fence.jpg?resize=300%2C193&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/ballantine-fence.jpg?resize=768%2C493&amp;ssl=1 768w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/ballantine-fence.jpg?resize=1024%2C658&amp;ssl=1 1024w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"text-align:center\">By: K.C. Jones<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">BLOOMINGTON, IN- The continuing construction near Ballantine hall is about to make students\u2019 lives a bit more difficult, as IU announced today that the fence surrounding Ballantine will be expanding to become a direct obstacle between you and your crush, specifically.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Construction worker T.J. Maxwell was doing his part this week to let students know before this part of the construction begins. &#8220;While I understand your frustration, it\u2019s not like you were gonna talk to your crush, like, ever. Come on.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When reached for comment, construction manager Joseph Quimbly stated, &#8220;They can never be allowed to form a union! A pox on both their houses!&#8221; Mr. Quimbly died of a mortal wound shortly thereafter.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Construction spokeswoman Diana Martin also read the following statement explaining the fence expansion: \u201cWe\u2019re sure a lot of people are upset about this, but frankly that\u2019s ignoring the truth of the matter. Guess what pussy? You were never going to talk to your crush. It&#8217;s time to move on. The fence is confident, unlike you. The fence knows what it wants, unlike you. It doesn\u2019t matter what you have to say about this construction. The fence has an amazingly tight, yet supple ass, unlike you.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ms. Martin later stated that future construction plans include expanding the fence around your estranged stepfather.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>By: K.C. Jones BLOOMINGTON, IN- The continuing construction near Ballantine hall is about to make students\u2019 lives a bit more difficult, as IU announced today that the fence surrounding Ballantine [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1438,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[65],"class_list":["post-1437","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-entertainment","tag-local","has_thumb"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/ballantine-fence.jpg?fit=2048%2C1315&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7b5Hd-nb","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1123,"url":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2018\/04\/27\/10-major-construction-projects-for-the-bicentennial\/","url_meta":{"origin":1437,"position":0},"title":"11 Major Construction Projects for the Bicentennial","author":"Hoosier Flipside","date":"April 27, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"By: Flipside Staff Transform IMU into Big Fucking Hole Let\u2019s be real here, the school has been planning to do this since 2015, but after massive student protests, they were unable to pull the trigger. Expect the building to finally undergo its beautiful transformation into a state-of-the-art hole in the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Local&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Local","link":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/category\/local\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/iu_bicentennial.jpg?fit=792%2C576&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/iu_bicentennial.jpg?fit=792%2C576&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/iu_bicentennial.jpg?fit=792%2C576&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/iu_bicentennial.jpg?fit=792%2C576&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":96,"url":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2015\/08\/22\/rps-announces-plan-to-transform-imu-into-big-fucking-hole\/","url_meta":{"origin":1437,"position":1},"title":"RPS Announces Plan to Transform IMU into Big Fucking Hole","author":"Hoosier Flipside","date":"August 22, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"By: Bismo Falcor IU administrators announced Monday their radical new plan to construct a brand new Big Fucking Hole, directly on the current site of the IMU. The final decision was made by Sir Reginald Dunn, head administrator at IU. He said this was the biggest construction project this campus\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Local&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Local","link":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/category\/local\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/imu1.jpg?fit=1200%2C821&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/imu1.jpg?fit=1200%2C821&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/imu1.jpg?fit=1200%2C821&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/imu1.jpg?fit=1200%2C821&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/imu1.jpg?fit=1200%2C821&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":474,"url":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2016\/11\/07\/breaking-hillary-clintons-deleted-emails-discovered-on-tenth-floor-of-ballantine-stairwell\/","url_meta":{"origin":1437,"position":2},"title":"Breaking: Hillary Clinton\u2019s \u201cDeleted Emails\u201d Discovered on Tenth Floor of Ballantine Stairwell","author":"Hoosier Flipside","date":"November 7, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"By: Fannie Wanker Students and amateur climbers should expect changes following the discovery of a Lenovo Yoga 2 laptop, which contained Word documents of every one of Hillary Clinton\u2019s emails, on the top floor of Ballantine Hall. Secret Service personnel and campus security have blocked off the ninth and tenth\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Entertainment&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Entertainment","link":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/category\/entertainment\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/11\/ballantine-hall.jpg?fit=375%2C500&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1480,"url":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2019\/03\/18\/op-ed-im-ballantine-hall-and-i-hate-you-too\/","url_meta":{"origin":1437,"position":3},"title":"Op-Ed: I&#8217;m Ballantine Hall and I Hate You Too","author":"Hoosier Flipside","date":"March 18, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"By: Fredrick Venus Ever since some asshole in a philosophy class pondered the existence of consciousness in limestone and the professor\u2019s head exploded, I poofed into existence. From that point forward, I have been forced to endure your endless stream of verbal diarrhea, criticizing my structure. You hate my brilliant\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Ballantine Stairs&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Ballantine Stairs","link":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/category\/ballantine-stairs\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/03\/ballantine-hall.jpg?fit=373%2C280&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":600,"url":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2017\/02\/14\/flipside-kama-sutra\/","url_meta":{"origin":1437,"position":4},"title":"Flipside Kama Sutra","author":"Hoosier Flipside","date":"February 14, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"By: Staff We at Flipside would like to wish all of our readers a wonderful Valentine's Day. Along with our wishes, please enjoy the Flipside Kama Sutra, a list composed of the 10 acts any romantic IU student should know. The Collins -\u00a0Look away in disgust every time a penis\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Entertainment&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Entertainment","link":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/category\/entertainment\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/16763819_1358746257501720_1499122204_o.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/16763819_1358746257501720_1499122204_o.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/16763819_1358746257501720_1499122204_o.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/16763819_1358746257501720_1499122204_o.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/16763819_1358746257501720_1499122204_o.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1531,"url":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2019\/04\/22\/indiana-university-announces-plan-to-reanimate-1830s-inaugural-class-for-bicentennial-celebration\/","url_meta":{"origin":1437,"position":5},"title":"Indiana University Announces Plan to Reanimate 1830s Inaugural Class for Bicentennial Celebration","author":"Hoosier Flipside","date":"April 22, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"By: Barry Vile, Flipside Staff Indiana University president Michael McRobbie recently announced plans to bring the entire Indiana University class of 1830 back to life for the school's 200th anniversary. \"It's incredible to think that we'll have the opportunity to have a firsthand account of the university from almost 200\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Local&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Local","link":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/category\/local\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/inaugural_class.jpg?fit=750%2C458&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/inaugural_class.jpg?fit=750%2C458&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/inaugural_class.jpg?fit=750%2C458&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/inaugural_class.jpg?fit=750%2C458&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1437","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1437"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1437\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1439,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1437\/revisions\/1439"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1438"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1437"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1437"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1437"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}