{"id":1495,"date":"2019-03-27T18:09:58","date_gmt":"2019-03-27T18:09:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/?p=1495"},"modified":"2019-03-27T18:10:35","modified_gmt":"2019-03-27T18:10:35","slug":"cant-go-home-cant-stay-here-5-things-for-commuters-to-do-during-their-3-hour-gap-between-classes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2019\/03\/27\/cant-go-home-cant-stay-here-5-things-for-commuters-to-do-during-their-3-hour-gap-between-classes\/","title":{"rendered":"Can’t Go Home, Can’t Stay Here: 9 Things for Commuters To Do During Their 3 Hour Gap Between Classes"},"content":{"rendered":"

By: Robbie McMichael, Sutton Lee Seymour, Flipside Staff<\/p>\n

\"commuter.jpg\"<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Pace around a very populous area and talk loudly on your phone: Don’t worry, we’re sure that everybody trying to cut through the Wells lobby to get to class or take a study break wants to hear all about how your roommate never bothers to do the fucking dishes.<\/li>\n
  2. Masturbate in the IMU bathroom: We recommend the one behind the desk with the sorority girls asking you for money. It\u2019s a little slow, yet there\u2019s still a chance someone might catch you. Kinky!<\/li>\n
  3. Skinny dip at the WIC: What, so now you’re expected to bring your swimsuit on campus every time you ride the bus over just in case you feel the need to get all moist? Nah, girl; #freethatnipple all over the place.<\/li>\n
  4. Get to second base with the Showalter Fountain booby lady: You know you want a little squeeze. So wet, so slippery. Come on, just do it.<\/li>\n
  5. Take your laptop to UITS with porn still playing onscreen: “I have no idea what happened, dude. The ad just said I’d meet hot Russian babes, and now all of a sudden I’ve got a virus?!? You can’t trust any illegal anime streaming sites these days!”<\/li>\n
  6. Catch squirrels with an empty laundry basket: It’s not like you were ever do your laundry anyway. Plus, roasted squirrel makes a great snack for when your dinky 500 I-BUCKS plan runs out after two weeks.<\/li>\n
  7. Play with the cadavers in Jordan Hall: Come on, they’re basically real-life Barbie dolls. When else will you get to do that tea party you’ve always dreamed of?<\/li>\n
  8. Join the cadavers in Jordan Hall: Convince them that you\u2019re one of them. It’ll make the corpses more willing to perform your bidding. Trust me.<\/li>\n
  9. Bully the IUPD cadets for not being real officers: NOTE:<\/strong> Recommended for white people only.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    By: Robbie McMichael, Sutton Lee Seymour, Flipside Staff Pace around a very populous area and talk loudly on your phone: Don’t worry, we’re sure that everybody trying to cut through […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1496,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"spay_email":"","jetpack_publicize_message":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i2.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/03\/commuter.jpg?fit=1000%2C534&ssl=1","jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7b5Hd-o7","jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1495"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1495"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1495\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1498,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1495\/revisions\/1498"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1496"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1495"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1495"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1495"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}