{"id":368,"date":"2016-09-14T23:15:59","date_gmt":"2016-09-14T23:15:59","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/?p=368"},"modified":"2016-12-02T00:56:32","modified_gmt":"2016-12-02T00:56:32","slug":"7-great-excuses-for-when-your-roommate-catches-you-masturbating-into-his-fishtank","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2016\/09\/14\/7-great-excuses-for-when-your-roommate-catches-you-masturbating-into-his-fishtank\/","title":{"rendered":"7 Great Excuses for when your Roommate Catches you Masturbating into his Fishtank"},"content":{"rendered":"

By: Phil<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. I was correcting the pH balance<\/li>\n
  2. You were sleeping and I needed motivation<\/li>\n
  3. It\u2019s just a prank bro<\/li>\n
  4. I can\u2019t finish if no one\u2019s watching<\/li>\n
  5. I have a Jaws fetish<\/li>\n
  6. I just watched The Little Mermaid and really need this right now<\/li>\n
  7. We ran out of fish food<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    By: Phil I was correcting the pH balance You were sleeping and I needed motivation It\u2019s just a prank bro I can\u2019t finish if no one\u2019s watching I have a […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":369,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-368","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-local","has_thumb"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/14348988_1195283293846871_1224613254_n.jpg?fit=900%2C599&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7b5Hd-5W","jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/368","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=368"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/368\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":516,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/368\/revisions\/516"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/369"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=368"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=368"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=368"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}