By: Constance T. Nopel<\/p>\n
After years of being called a \u201cGrammar Nazi,\u201d Franz Armbr\u00fcster, resident english<\/span> (Gro\u00dfschreibung, Idiot!) English<\/strong> major, decided to enlist into the Language Wehremacht. As a historical nod to its German roots, the Language Wehremacht seeks to fulfill the Nazi regime\u2019s long-term goals of cleansing the colored impurities from the human race as well as correcting any grammar and\/or spelling mistakes it may encounter. Bye<\/span> (Falsche Rechtsschreibung!) By<\/strong> the time Franz Armbr\u00fcster was a young adult, he had professed his passion for “correcting” others to make them “feel worse than the over-privileged Jews post-shower.” Given Armbr\u00fcster\u2019s previously known enthusiasm for both grammatical correctness and white supremacy, Franz Armbr\u00fcster felt particularly moved by Hitler\u2019s own story of genocidal text speak:<\/p>\n Following his country\u2019s embittered defeat and poor grammar at the Rise of the Third Write, Adolf Hitler formed the Nazi Party. Soon, millions flocked to his rallies to hear his speeches on the proper use of “its” versus “it’s”. Hitler rose to power on a platform of improved literacy programs and the banned democracy. Soon the world began to tremmble<\/span> tremble<\/strong> (Dummkopf!) before the might of his grammatical knowledge and trailblazing facial hair.<\/p>\n \u201cDer gut \u00f6lde daes,\u201d mused Armbr\u00fcster. Still, the young man is detmerined<\/span> determined<\/strong> to make as positive an impact on the english<\/span> English<\/strong> lang\u2014<\/p>\n *Note: the author was interrupted by Franz Armbr\u00fcster, who executed him given the frequency of grammatical errors in the above article.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" By: Constance T. Nopel After years of being called a \u201cGrammar Nazi,\u201d Franz Armbr\u00fcster, resident english (Gro\u00dfschreibung, Idiot!) English major, decided to enlist into the Language Wehremacht. As a historical […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":124,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[3],"tags":[6,45,48,51,55,70,102],"class_list":["post-84","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-politics","tag-adolf-hitler","tag-franz-armbruster","tag-germany","tag-grammar-nazi","tag-holocaust","tag-nazi","tag-wehremacht","has_thumb"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/grammar_nazi1.png?fit=600%2C600&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7b5Hd-1m","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":527,"url":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2016\/12\/08\/op-ed-dabbing-is-dangerous-and-killing-youth\/","url_meta":{"origin":84,"position":0},"title":"OP-ED: Dabbing is Dangerous and Killing Youth","author":"Hoosier Flipside","date":"December 8, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"By: Barry Vile The day that I watched my 10-year-old brother get hit by a car while dabbing in a crosswalk is the day I realized that our country's youth are suffering from a dangerous case of OCD: Over Compulsively Dabbing. From the time that dabbing first became a part\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Local"","block_context":{"text":"Local","link":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/category\/local\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/12\/DabbingCar.jpg?fit=1024%2C681&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/12\/DabbingCar.jpg?fit=1024%2C681&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/12\/DabbingCar.jpg?fit=1024%2C681&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/12\/DabbingCar.jpg?fit=1024%2C681&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":661,"url":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2017\/03\/01\/pope-francis-confirms-god-is-just-one-of-the-guys\/","url_meta":{"origin":84,"position":1},"title":"Pope Francis Confirms God is “Just One of the Guys”","author":"Hoosier Flipside","date":"March 1, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"By: Pink Freud VATICAN CITY -- In an official statement issued by the Holy See, His Holiness the Pontiff Pope Francis affirmed the centuries old church doctrine that God is a straight-up bro. Emerging from the Man Cave of St. Peter and wearing a backwards skull cap, Pope Francis greeted\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Entertainment"","block_context":{"text":"Entertainment","link":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/category\/entertainment\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/BroJesusPic.png?fit=1200%2C748&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/BroJesusPic.png?fit=1200%2C748&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/BroJesusPic.png?fit=1200%2C748&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/BroJesusPic.png?fit=1200%2C748&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/BroJesusPic.png?fit=1200%2C748&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":368,"url":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2016\/09\/14\/7-great-excuses-for-when-your-roommate-catches-you-masturbating-into-his-fishtank\/","url_meta":{"origin":84,"position":2},"title":"7 Great Excuses for when your Roommate Catches you Masturbating into his Fishtank","author":"Hoosier Flipside","date":"September 14, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"By: Phil I was correcting the pH balance You were sleeping and I needed motivation It\u2019s just a prank bro I can\u2019t finish if no one\u2019s watching I have a Jaws fetish I just watched The Little Mermaid and really need this right now We ran out of fish food","rel":"","context":"In "Local"","block_context":{"text":"Local","link":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/category\/local\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/14348988_1195283293846871_1224613254_n.jpg?fit=900%2C599&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/14348988_1195283293846871_1224613254_n.jpg?fit=900%2C599&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/14348988_1195283293846871_1224613254_n.jpg?fit=900%2C599&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/14348988_1195283293846871_1224613254_n.jpg?fit=900%2C599&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":613,"url":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2017\/02\/16\/iu-now-offering-mansplaining-as-second-language\/","url_meta":{"origin":84,"position":3},"title":"IU Now Offering Mansplaining as Second Language","author":"Hoosier Flipside","date":"February 16, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"By: Pink Freud BLOOMINGTON, IN -- Indiana University has just announced plans to begin offering the art of overly simplifying and talking down to other people as a second language for all those who aren't quite sure what a man means when he is explaining something. \u201cWhen I first came\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Local"","block_context":{"text":"Local","link":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/category\/local\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/mansplaining.jpg?fit=750%2C400&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/mansplaining.jpg?fit=750%2C400&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/mansplaining.jpg?fit=750%2C400&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/mansplaining.jpg?fit=750%2C400&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":159,"url":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2015\/08\/23\/iu-welcomes-wingdings-cultural-center\/","url_meta":{"origin":84,"position":4},"title":"IU Welcomes Wingdings Cultural Center","author":"Hoosier Flipside","date":"August 23, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"*We apologize on behalf of Wordpress on its prejudice against the Wingding history and its people, as evidenced by the website's refusal to accommodate their culture and language.* By: Pink Freud This year, IU\u2019s international community marks a milestone with the opening of the Wingdings Cultural Center. Since gaining recognition\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Local"","block_context":{"text":"Local","link":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/category\/local\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/wingding.png?fit=1200%2C901&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/wingding.png?fit=1200%2C901&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/wingding.png?fit=1200%2C901&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/wingding.png?fit=1200%2C901&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/wingding.png?fit=1200%2C901&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1218,"url":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/2018\/09\/28\/progress-iu-english-department-to-teach-grammatically-correct-forms-of-yeet\/","url_meta":{"origin":84,"position":5},"title":"BREAKING: IU English Department to Teach Grammatically-Correct Forms of “Yeet”","author":"Hoosier Flipside","date":"September 28, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"By: Boxxer Brief BLOOMINGTON, IN--IU's English Department rule last week that with \"yeet\" finding its way into everyday vernacular, college of arts and science students should be taught the grammatically correct forms of \"yeet\". This progressive move comes as a surprise after last year' \"whomsier\" initiative was yeeted. \"I believe\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Education"","block_context":{"text":"Education","link":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/category\/education\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/yeet.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/yeet.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/yeet.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/yeet.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoosierflipside.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/yeet.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/84","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=84"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/84\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":255,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/84\/revisions\/255"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/124"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=84"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=84"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoosierflipside.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=84"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}