FlipsideBusiness: Buy? Sell? What do I do with all of these lemons during a turbulent market?
By: Fannie Wanker Strange times are with us, and nobody really knows what the market is going to do. Buy, sell, hold, equity, valuation: these are all words that can…
Kentucky Land Values Skyrocket in Anticipation of Becoming Ocean-front by 2020
By: Hermynn Bae Wells In anticipation of global climate change ravaging our dear Mother Earth, realtors and future homeowners have jumped at the astounding opportunity for real estate. While other…
Chaos Ensues After Student Declares the Floor is Lava During Career Fair
By: Jacopo Inboden BLOOMINGTON, IN— Mayhem recently broke out at a Kelley School of Business Career Fair after an unidentified passerby declared that the floor was lava, making this the fifth…
Kelley to Begin Offering Degree in “Inheritance Consumption”
By: Joe King BLOOMINGTON, IN--Indiana University administration announced this week that, in 2017, the Kelley School of Business will introduce a new degree program that will allow certain students to…
From Samoas to the Slammer: It’s How the Cookie Crumbles
By: Constance T. Nopel I spotted her pigtails from across the parking lot. Wide, blue eyes with hair ribbons to match. She was clever, this one. A drug dealer of…
FDA Amends Blood Drive Deferral for Satan’s Sexually Sickening Sodomites
By: Constance T. Nopel Sequin-sexuals have rejoiced in the FDA’s announcement to amend its lifetime blood donation deferral for men who have had sex with other men. In response to…