WARNING: With Halloween Drawing to a Close, the Defenses Holding Back Mariah Carey Are at Their Weakest
By: Picov Andropov and Jake Spear THE ICE REALM, Asgard – As winter ‘proaches nigh, and the elder gods stir, Mariah Carey thunderously warms up her vocal chords, hastily chipping away…
Tinder Dos and Don’ts
By: Flipside Staff DO put your least attractive pictures first - if they were willing to swipe right on your half-drunken, no-makeup selfie, they'll stick with you for life DO…
12 Things That Will Make Jesus Reconsider Dying For Your Sins
By: Jake Spear You address Him in your prayers as "My Heavenly Daddy" It's easy to mix up Jesus with his dad, so he might give you a pass for…
11 Underrated Spring Break Destinations
By: Aesthetic Danger Still not sure where to spend the next week? Check out Flipside's list of great alternative spring break destinations! 12 underrated destinations for Spring Break: 1. North…
BREAKING: Student Running Cockfighting Ring Out of Dorm Room Cites Loophole in Roommate Agreement
By: Cleetus Haversham BLOOMINGTON-- Following the trail of blood and feathers leading from Gresham Dining Hall to the Foster Hall B Tower, Bloomington PD recently apprehended freshman Justin Stevens, for…
8 Ways To Spoil Your Valentine as a Broke College Student
Valentine's day is a truly magical time of year. With chocolate, and flowers, and creaking bed-springs there's just so much to enjoy. But as a college student, you want an…
Frustrated God Temporarily Revokes Area Man’s Free Will
By: Bismo Falcor BLOOMINGTON, IN -- Following a series of outrageously stupid decisions, God has announced he will be temporarily suspending Junior Brad Heyward’s right to free will. “I’ve witnessed…
12 Undiscovered Bars in Bloomington
Tired of drinking alone in your apartment on a Wednesday afternoon? Escaping from your roommates fucking like a pair of baboons in heat? Raise the bar for your drinking experience! The…
Prohibition of Greek Life Social Events Leads to Opening of Speakeasy in Wells Stacks
By: Sutton Lee Seymour and Jonathan Pollock BOOMINGTON, IN - In light of the recent Interfraternity Council’s prohibition of social events and alcohol circulation among Greek houses, dissatisfied members have opened…
Skyrim Switch Port Proves Bethesda Can Sell Literally Anything as Many Times as They Want
By: Sutton Lee Seymour ROCKVILLE, MD - Last Saturday, Nintendo released Skyrim for its new Switch console, finally proving that companies can re-package any successful product as many times as…